Batman ( * * )
Few movies own a period of time like Batman owned the summer of 1989. I can still remember the ads, though, that said, "The Abyss blows Batman out of the water!" And it did, but not financially. Still, I had the buttons and the t-shirts and some other shit, and I was psyched, and for the most part, it didn't suck. Then Batman broke character and killed a bunch of goons with a bomb and his batplane machine guns, and I was like, well, they fucked it up--a hypothesis further proven by the inept, incoherent fight scenes at the end.
The Acting: Nicholson steals the show so much that I was rooting for him to get away at the end, and even after he fell to his death I was like, "they could bring him back." Keaton, who proved he had dramatic chops in Clean And Sober a year earlier, not to mention psychotic chops in Beetlejuice, was excellent as the Dark Knight. Kim Basinger's hot, but I wanted to strangle her. Robert Wuhl is not hot, but I wanted to strangle him, too. And three cheers for the black Harvey Dent, Mr. Billy Dee Williams. Michael Clarke "Kingpin of Crime" Duncan owes you a royalty check, buddy.
The Story: Oh, the usual horseshit.
The Direction: Tim Burton got his start at Disney, which I suppose explains the ridonculous cartoon Batman silhouette on top of that building near the start of the film. CGI, all is forgiven.
Overall: "Gotham City...always puts a smile on my face." Maybe not, but Jack does...and the anticipation was entertaining in itself. But it's too bad that the Frank Miller of that era was off writing Robocop 2 or whatall instead of doctoring this script.
Tredekka Rules:
The Acting: Nicholson steals the show so much that I was rooting for him to get away at the end, and even after he fell to his death I was like, "they could bring him back." Keaton, who proved he had dramatic chops in Clean And Sober a year earlier, not to mention psychotic chops in Beetlejuice, was excellent as the Dark Knight. Kim Basinger's hot, but I wanted to strangle her. Robert Wuhl is not hot, but I wanted to strangle him, too. And three cheers for the black Harvey Dent, Mr. Billy Dee Williams. Michael Clarke "Kingpin of Crime" Duncan owes you a royalty check, buddy.
The Story: Oh, the usual horseshit.
The Direction: Tim Burton got his start at Disney, which I suppose explains the ridonculous cartoon Batman silhouette on top of that building near the start of the film. CGI, all is forgiven.
Overall: "Gotham City...always puts a smile on my face." Maybe not, but Jack does...and the anticipation was entertaining in itself. But it's too bad that the Frank Miller of that era was off writing Robocop 2 or whatall instead of doctoring this script.
Tredekka Rules:
- Rule 4: Sweet Actor Bonus--Jack Nicholson, +1 point. If they're going to make up a name for The Joker, they might as well have called him Jack Nicholson instead of Jack Napier. And what kind of fag hitman asks, "You ever danced with the devil by the pale moon light?" Might as well say to your victims, "I'll slob your knob for a dollar."
- Rule 6: Over The Top Acting Award--Nicholson, +1 point. He carries the movie. He deserves the top bill.
- Rule 13: Spawned A Shitty TV Series Penalty--even Adam West would agree that this is applicable somehow. -1 point.
- Rule 24: Exploding Buildings Are Good--I'm starting to hate this rule. But I gotta give it. +1 point.
- Rule 32: William Hootkins = Blockbuster. Eckhardt, think about the future! Of the franchise! +1 star.
- Rule 34 (NEW RULE): The Superhero Movie Handicap--is -1 star. I don't know what it is, but most superhero movies just naturally suck, because the studio ties in charge don't give a shit about the source material, yet they feel the need to micromanage. However, it's not unusual for superhero movie sequels to find their sea-legs...
Tredekka Score: ( * * )
posted by Tredekka at 9:27 PM
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